In the past few weeks, I have handed out three baskets. Three different journeys, three different stories. Each basket that I deliver, I go in with an open mind, the way they are received, each situation has been special and unique.
Today, I received a text from the social worker at the hospital. You just delivered your baby. Your perfect baby was placed in your arms. You cried tears of joy. You hugged your husband, you are prepared to start your journey. The nurse takes your baby away and when she returns, she tells you the news. Your baby has Down syndrome. You are shocked. Your eyes fill with tears, no longer tears of happiness, but tears of upset, sadness and fear. You feel like your hopes and dreams have been shattered. Your husband is your rock, he strokes your hand but he has no words. He feels broken, his brand new baby boy is no longer perfect. He holds it in because he is there for you. He can not tell you that he feels lost.
I am at home putting together the most perfect basket for you. A basket that is filled with baby items sent to me from all over the world. The basket contains books of happy, uplifting stories that you will read once you are ready. There is a journal for you to chronicle all of your thoughts and fears and a list of resources, so that when you leave the hospital, you will feel prepared and ready to begin this beautiful journey. I was once there. I didn't receive a basket. I didn't receive a list of resources. I was trying to remember the links, who to contact and I was trying to keep all of the pamphlets organized so that I could learn more about Down syndrome, our new world. I knew before my baby arrived that she had Down syndrome, but I still didn't feel fully prepared.
You didn't know that your unborn baby would have an extra chromosome, but now you do and you don't know where to start. Your world comes to a screeching halt.
I am on my way with your basket. The memories come flooding back but I am looking forward to meeting you. I won't tell you that it will be easy. I won't tell you that you will not be faced with some struggles. I won't tell you that the road ahead will be smooth, no bumps and no upset. I will tell you that this is your baby. I will tell you that there will be moments that will fill your heart with so much joy that Down syndrome will take a backseat. I will tell you that sometimes it's overwhelming and you need to stop and take a deep breath. I will tell you that your baby will look like you and act like you. I will tell you that milestones and tiny moments will make you smile. I will tell you that you will love this baby with every ounce of your being and your world will be become a better place.
We sit and talk and before I walk out of the room, I tell you that it will all be ok. It will be ok.
* I included a picture of a sweet baby boy who was the recipient of a basket. This blog post is not about his beautiful family.
* Thank you to all of my friends and family who have travelled this journey with us. I am blessed and thankful. Thank you for your love and support.
* Thank you to all of my friends and family who have travelled this journey with us. I am blessed and thankful. Thank you for your love and support.