Still Learning.....

Back in the day :)


My post from yesterday talked about how some friends and family have stated that Adele doesn't look like she has Down syndrome and how it really doesn't bother me. My dear friend Jenny left this comment for me today and it really does make sense. It made me see what things may be like down the road, when Adele gets into school and when her features are more prominent. I deleted the comments on the blog so it's not repeated...




Brinley - 1 day old :)


Jenny.....


First off, love how the blog looks, who ever did it did a fantastic job!! Second, I feel the same way about the "Downs" thing...
But third, when people tell me Russell doesn't even look like he has Down syndrome, ya, I don't like that. And no I don't take it as a compliment. You may feel differently as Adele gets older. She is a baby right now, and no people may not be noticing. But as she gets older and her features stand out a little more, you may not take it as a compliment when people say that type of thing to you. I guess I take offence because I know damn well people can tell my son has Ds, he has all the features, so when they say "you can hardly tell" it makes me feel like they think looking like you have Down syndrome is a horrible thing. That he would be ugly if he looked like he had Ds. I just don't see how it is a compliment at all when some one says he doesn't look like he has something that is in every cell of his body and gives him a very distinctive look. Just tell me he's cute. Don't tell me he doesn't look like he has Ds. It's a part of him and we are proud of it. Anyway...
I also agree with you though that people just don't know any better and often times don't know what to say. I saw a great post on that on FB the other day. I'll try and find it, it's worth reading. Great post!




CRAZY HAIR!!


Krista.....


Thanks Jenny! I'm sure eventually I won't like it, but right now because she's only been around for 11 weeks, I only have a short list of things that piss me off. As she gets older, that list will get longer and I will get meaner. :)
I totally get where you're coming from. I do just want people to say that she's sweet and cute and she looks just like her sister. People don't know and that's the thing...in their mind it is a compliment and not something that is negative.
When people think of Ds, they have an image in their mind, so when they see a child with milder features, I think it surprises them and they feel that it must be a mild case of Ds....kind of like the flu....just mild. :)
I could hear your sort of anger in your post. I knew that you weren't a fan of being told that Russell looks like he doesn't have Ds, so I was waiting for your response because I respect what you have to say. I value your opinion. I am new to all of this and am learning. I write how I feel that day.




Always posing!


Jenny.....


No, no..No anger, I certainly wouldn't want what I said to come off as angry in anyway. I guess I just feel it's unnecessary for people to say they don't think he looks like he has Ds. But like you said, they think it's a compliment and they are trying to be nice. It's just hard sometimes you know, not to be oversensitive. I think I am in many ways...I take to many things to heart when it comes to Russell. I just love him so much I don't ever want him to hurt, or feel the stares, or be spoken of certain ways. *sigh*...Being oversensitive is something I need to work on for sure.

Love all your posts, I imagine your family and friends are learning so much from what you are putting out there. Oh, and LOVE the little half smiles Adele is doing these days. So stinkin cute :)




LOVE


Krista.....

I meant the anger thing, that it hurts you and irks you. I know you're not ticked at me. :) I hear your anger and frustration when it comes to Russell and how others see him and the comments that have been made towards him and the family. I am dreading so many things as Adele gets older. I'm not the best when it comes to filtering and sometimes it comes out quickly and abruptly. Right now, most of the comments come from kids, they are wondering what's up Adele's nose. It's a simple answer and no feelings are hurt. I give the children their answer and they are content. I am also very overly sensitive. Thank God our kids have awesome parents! :)))

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